I'm not sure we all realize how much impact moms have on their home. Moms have a huge influence on whether our home feels cozy and relaxing or negative and chaotic (and I'm not talking about that happy busy family chaos - I'm talking the crabby chaos that comes from a mom who's pulling her hair out.). And it has nothing to do with having perfect decor or color-coded organizing systems or crock pot meals planned for the month. It has to do with comparing ourselves to others. When we think everyone else is doing it all and we're not doing enough, we feel discontent in our homes. We can't be our best selves when we're worried about keeping up with what everyone else is doing. We might try to do too much and end up doing none of it well, making us feel frazzled and crabby. We might feel like giving up, leading to a cluttered mess of a home that isn't relaxing for anyone.
I think the first step in using your "mom superpower" is to think about what kind of vibe you want your home to have. How do you want home to FEEL? How do you want your kids to describe their childhood after they grow up? What words come to mind? The answers to those questions will give you hints as to what you can prioritize. Is it calm, cozy, vibrant, energetic, colorful, happy, or peaceful? Choose a few to start with, and brainstorm ways that you can add to the feeling you want to cultivate. Is it relaxation? Maybe you can work on decluttering and sprucing up part of your living room so that your family has one place to hang out together that feels good. After all, it can be hard to relax when you're surround by a mess. The whole house doesn't need to be in perfect order, but having a handle on one area feels really good. Do you want your kids to look back and remember how fun and vibrant their home life was? Make sure you have space dedicated to childhood...room for them to play without keeping things looking just-so all the time. Is cozy the word that comes to mind? Make sure your family room is equipped with a soft lamp and lots of blankets and pillows that invite snuggling and closeness.
Next, figure out what you're good at. I know there's something. There's one aspect of family life that comes more naturally to you than the rest. Is it decorating, organizing, cooking, crafting, fashion, planning great trips, or having an active lifestyle? Or maybe you pour your talents into your day job and the home life stuff is a struggle. That's ok! Do the thing you're good at, do it really well, and take pride in it. As for the rest? Well, we can't always forget about it, because people need to eat whether or not we like to cook. But we can look for ways to streamline, simplify, or share the jobs that we don't enjoy as much. Give yourself grace. Little eyes are watching you. Show them by example how to love themselves for who they are.
Stick with me as I share lots of tips for simplifying all kinds of areas of home life...not to the level of perfection (those tips are already abundant online), but just to the level of good enough. But for now, identify what you're good at, and let it energize you. Recognize the impact your "mom superpower" can have on the vibe in your home, and work on identifying ways you can improve that if it's not quite where you want it to be.
And take heart in know that NONE of us are doing it all, even if it might look that way online.
Blessings from our homestead to yours,
Ang & Matt